I Almost Left Massage Therapy Behind

In 2019, I went back to school to study psychology.

At the time, I had been practicing massage for about 9 years and was very burned out from working in the wellness industry. I was doing 6 to 8 massages a day 5 days a week... while navigating a recent diabetes diagnosis. I craved helping people, but I was exhausted all the time, and I wasn’t sure how much longer my body could continue working the way I had been.

Going back to college felt exciting. I was ready to learn something new and imagine a different future.

I had dreamed of becoming an addiction counselor with my own office: Sitting one-on-one with people, listening to their stories, and helping them work through their past and navigate their daily lives. I had overcome an addiction in my early 20's and I wanted to help others do the same. I loved studying the brain and found myself fascinated by the ways our experiences shape our thoughts, behaviors, relationships -and bodies. For about four years, I balanced school part-time with working full-time, and caring for my daughter.

I’m especially grateful to my family for being there to help every step of the way. I truly wouldn’t have been able to do it without them.
I moved very slowly through the college curriculum, taking 1 or 2 classes at a time, but I kept going. I was proud of myself for continuing to learn while carrying so many other responsibilities. 

Then life changed again.

I found out my son was on his way into this world. At 8 months pregnant, I closed my business- Then called: Intuitive Massage and Bodywork, I stepped away from school (I felt I no longer was able to focus), and I focused on another dream: building my family.

But bodywork is more than just a job for me. It feels like a calling. While I was away coping with postpartum life, I realized how much I missed my clients and working. So when my son was four months old, I returned to massage. 
But I didn’t come back as the same person who had left. A new spark had ignited in me.

While I was home with the kids, I continued studying herbalism, something I had been practicing for household-use for over a decade. Herbal medicine is particularly meaningful to me because it helped support me mentally, physically, and spiritually after overcoming opioid addiction. I felt ready to bring more of it into my work and I realized how much I loved running my own business. So, a new vision for my career began to emerge. Sammi Jo's Massage and Apothecary was born. 

I could use my psychology background to create more intentional one-on-one experiences with my clients. I could draw from my herbalism education to incorporate holistic healing - and TEA! I could use my continuing education and knowledge from working in a chiropractic office to offer more medical massage. I could draw from my years in the spa industry to create treatments that feel calming and supportive of the nervous system. Along with the interesting new classes I have scheduled coming soon- I could bring all of these modalities together to create a unique and restorative experience for each client. I’m grateful that my work can hold all of these parts of me.

It all fits together.

I didn’t finish my psychology degree, but college helped me feel capable and the education I received continues to shape the way I work. I’m more interested than ever in the relationship between emotional well-being and physical health. 
Maybe this is what growth looks like: not becoming someone entirely new, but gathering everything you’ve learned along the way and allowing it to become part of the work that blooms and spreads hope to others. 

Getting Back on the Table

For two years, I didn’t receive massages from anyone else. When I tell other massage therapists this, I’m usually met with horrified looks.

But life was crazy. I went through a pregnancy, had my baby boy, and adjusted to a new life with a newborn and a pre-teen. It felt like I didn’t have the time… or the extra income… to spend on my own body. But I was still recovering and still needed bodywork, so I had to work on myself.
Through intentionally setting aside time for self-massage, I began getting to know myself and my body again. My last blog post touched on this idea: how touch can become a form of self-discovery.

After recently opening my new massage suite and finally getting settled, I decided it was long past time to start meeting other therapists and receiving massages again. I craved getting out of my comfort zone, having new experiences, and connecting with new people in the field.
And let me tell you… the past few months, I’ve met some of the most talented, genuine, and inspiring therapists. (See the end of this post to read about who I tried!)

Getting back onto the massage table felt unexpectedly vulnerable. Not just physically, but emotionally. Therapists asked about injuries, surgeries, stress, pregnancies, car accidents…the entire story of my body. Stories and experiences I haven’t fully recovered from emotionally. It reminded me how exposing receiving a massage can be.
I ask many of these same questions on my own intake forms, but it’s different when you’re the one answering them. It’s humbling.
As I talked through the history of my injuries, pain, and emotional stress, I realized how rarely we feel genuinely witnessed in that way. How often do most people experience touch with healing intention?

On a massage table, the body no longer has to be strong or hide its discomfort. The body can feel when it’s being genuinely listened to, and that kind of compassion helps it release some of the burden it has been carrying. For a moment, the outside world quiets down, and the nervous system feels safe enough to soften, speak, and be heard.

Getting to know someone through touch is a silent conversation.
It can feel awkward or uncomfortable at first.
It’s hard to let someone new in.
It can take time for the conversation to start flowing.
I was guarded at first, but slowly I felt my body beginning to trust each person working on me.
I could feel them paying attention to every scar.
I could feel them trying to understand why certain areas were protecting themselves.
And eventually, I let go.
It has been deeply needed healing.

This year, for me, is about stepping outside my comfort zone. It’s about learning more about business, massage, new techniques, and new people.
My plan is to continue trading with and trying new therapists whenever I can. These people are so caring and passionate about what they do. Their dedication is incredibly inspiring. I’m a student in this world, and I want to soak up every bit of learning that I can.

Amazing Therapists Ive tried and Recommend:

1. Alyssa Flores - Ashidojo Barefoot Massage Studio - Impressive broad pressure and barefoot flow. Intuitive with her toes!
2. Kristen Kreitzinger- Embodiment Spa Fusion -Talented lymphatic and renewed my silhouette for summer! She’s very knowledgeable
3. Nicole Gibbons - North Texas Integrated Wellness - She works down the hall from me and has an Amazing intuitive detailed touch

Self Massage

Touch has always been powerful.

We instinctively use it to comfort others…
holding a hand when someone is scared,
hugging someone who is grieving,
laying a hand on someone in prayer.

But somewhere along the way,
we stopped offering that same touch and tenderness to ourselves.

We spend our days tending to everything around us…
cleaning, holding, organizing, maintaining the spaces we move through.
At the end of the day we clean the house, brush our teeth, shower away the grime, and make room for something fresh tomorrow.
Every time we reset our outer world, we feel it: that lightness, less mental chatter, deep breath returning.

And we know what happens when we don’t clear it: things become heavy, hoarded, hard to move through.
But the body, our inner landscape, is often left out of that same rhythm of care.

I like to think of the body as a garden

A living, changing space that requires attention,
love, warmth, and water if you want it to thrive.
Self-massage is one effective way to tend that garden on your own.
And I want to encourage all of my clients to practice it as a small ritual of self-reflection and love.

You have to shake hands with your own soil, loosen its grip
have a conversation with your foundation
and get to know the place you live in every single day.

You clear debris.
Soften what has hardened.
You make space for movement again.
Plant seeds and water the things you wish to keep cultivating.
Some areas will feel open, malleable, ready for growth.
But others will feel hardened, guarded…
like something beneath the surface has been thirsting.

This is where tension, stagnation, and blockages live.
Where the “weeds” begin to push through the dried-up cracks.
Where something is asking for your attention.
And this takes time: To feel, listen, and understand.
You can’t water the soil once and expect it to be soft by morning.
It takes consistency: watering, weeding, sunlight, patience, care.
And when you give it that attention over and over again, things begin to change.

One of my teachers once told me,
“You can only take your clients as far as you can take yourself.”

So I practice self-massage every day.
I check in with myself.
I explore the tension and where it travels.
I learn what release feels like,
so I can recognize it in someone else.

The more time you spend with your body in this way, the more intuitive you become.
You begin to trust what you feel.
You develop a sensitivity to your own needs.
You build confidence in your ability to care for yourself.
Self-massage becomes less of a foreign language
and more of a ritual of self-communication and care.

So tonight, or whenever you feel ready,
take a few moments to slow down.
Turn inward, and just begin.

Gardener (a closing ritual)

I invite you to close your eyes
(after you read this)
and hold your own hand

Trace your thumb firmly
over your other hand’s palm

Notice the friction of skin touching skin
each crease, each crevice
Which spots are hot or cold
move your fingers like antennas
tune in to the tender areas
and shake hands with every fiber of your being

Then go deeper.
Don’t force your way in, you’re guarded for a reason
If you take your time, your nervous system will trust you enough
to let you in

move slow, be patient
Thank your arms for all they have carried
be grateful your legs have gotten you this far
Search yourself and ask questions
What has this area of my body endured?
Where is this pain stemming from?

Listen to what your body is telling you